- General information about child anxiety
- Personal stories
- About the Child & Adolescent Anxiety Clinic
- Information for Referrers & Teachers
Stories about young people with anxiety
- Maisy - Worry Express
- Thomas - Don't Go Mum
- Sam - But they might laugh
- Kate - Checking 1, 2, 3
- Christopher - It could happen!
Maisy - Worry Express
Maisy came to the clinic as her parents were concerned about her degree of worry, her physical symptoms due to worry, and her unhappiness at school.
Overall, Maisy was described as a child who always anticipated the worst possible outcome. She worried that her father's plane would crash, that her baby brother would fall out of his pram, that she would make a mistake on the weekly spelling test, about what would happen in the future, about passing her driving test (in 10 years time) and the possibility of getting into trouble. Her parents reported that she blamed herself when the whole class got into trouble, and that she felt a need to be perfect at everything. If she made a mistake, she would say things such as "I'm stupid". Her teachers had noticed that her peers felt she was "bossy" because Maisy was so concerned with keeping to the written and unwritten rules of the school that she would regularly tell them to line up for class ten minutes before the bell, "in case they were late". She felt unsafe at night; worrying that her mother would leave the front door open and strangers would come into the house while they slept. Maisy worried about her relationships with peers worrying that others would be mean to her.
Maisy's worries were accompanied by numerous physical symptoms. She reported a pounding heart, "funny feelings" in her throat, butterflies in her stomach, and nausea. Her parents reported that she was often restless, sometimes short tempered with peers, and had difficulty with making decisions. There was rarely a day when Maisy did not express a worry to her parents, and once she began to worry it was difficult for her to stop thinking about it. Often Maisy would bring up an incident, which occurred weeks before and ask her parents what they remembered. Maisy did not avoid any particular situations or events, however if there was an unfamiliar event coming up she would ask constant questions about who would be there, what would happen and what she would be expected to do. Once satisfied, she would happily attend the event. Maisy's parents reported that she had always been a child who thought too much about all the things which could go wrong, but that the amount of worry had been rapidly increasing since starting school and was now at the point which caused significant difficulty for Maisy and her family on a daily basis. Maisy had trouble sleeping, was very unhappy at school and her parents where finding it difficult to reassure her as often as she wanted them to and they had started to not go out as often, as it was too upsetting for Maisy.
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Thomas - Don't Go Mum
Thomas was 10 when his parents brought him to the clinic. Thomas had a school camp at the end of the year that neither of them thought he would be able to go to as he could not even sleep in his own room at night.
Thomas was afraid that something bad would happen to his parents, that they would be in a terrible car accident or that they might die while he was sleeping. He was also terrified that he would be kidnapped when they were out shopping. Thomas often rang his father at work just to check that he was ok, even spending his lunch money on phone calls from school. Thomas would worry every afternoon while waiting for his father to come home from work. If he was not in the door by 6.15pm, Thomas would start pacing between the kitchen and the front door becoming increasingly distressed and inconsolable.
Thomas regularly had nightmares about bad things happening to his mum and dad. These always led to him to sleeping in their room on a mattress at the end of their bed. Even to get to sleep one of his parents had to stay in his room until he drifted off.
Thomas never went anywhere without his parents, even school was difficult with tears common at the beginning of each day. Thomas did not visit friends unless his mother stayed with him. His parents had not gone out on their own for a few years because Thomas would become highly distressed just at the thought of being left with a babysitter or even his grandparents.
All of these fears had led to much frustration in the family, Thomas was constantly overtired and his parents needed time for themselves, and Thomas needed to develop independence from them if he was ever going to go to camp.
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Sam - But they might laugh
Even as a toddler Sam was shy, always hiding behind mum's skirt and not wanting to say hello to adults. Now this shyness was more extreme, Sam avoided social activities with peers, had few friends and was very self-conscious.
Sam's biggest fears where that others would laugh if she made a mistake or that they might think that she was stupid. Sam found it easier to avoid doing anything that might make her stand out to others. At school, she avoided performing in front of others, didn't participate in class discussions, wouldn't volunteer answers to questions from teachers and spent much of the recess and lunch times at school wandering in and out of the library or trying to help teachers with odd jobs. If asked a question unexpectedly Sam would often become quite upset, and sometimes started to cry. This would upset her even more and sometimes made it difficult for her to go to school over the next few days. At home, Sam would talk happily to her family but would become very quiet if people who she did not know where visiting. Her parents commented that she never answered the phone (letting the answer machine get it to see who it was first) and that she very rarely rang any of her schoolmates. When out at shopping centres, Sam didn't speak to shop assistants and would rather search for items that she couldn't find rather than ask for help. Despite being interested in nature, camping and bushwalking Sam was not willing to join any group like scouts, and didn't play any team sports, preferring too stay at home.
Sam wasn't very happy about how life was going, telling her parents that she was lonely, sometimes she would seem very sad, most of all she wanted to feel less shy and be able to do more things with friends.
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Kate - Checking 1, 2, 3
To most people Kate was a confident and happy. She did very well at school and had lots of friends. These things were all true but what many people didn't know was that Kate was dreadfully afraid that something bad would happen if she didn't do certain things in a particular way. Kate had several routines, at night and before going out she had to check each window and door lock moving around the house in a clockwise fashion. She usually did this at least three times (which took about 10 minutes) but sometimes she would keep checking for up to an hour. If she didn't check she would get very worried, wouldn't be able to sleep or would become distressed that someone would break into the house while they were out. Kate's parents sometimes woke in the middle of the night finding Kate quietly checking the windows and doors again.
Kate also had a more subtle habit, she believed that she had to make things even. This meant that if she touched something with her right hand she also had too touch it with her left. A lot of the time she would use both hands to do everything. Occasionally Kate would get into trouble because of this habit, when at the museum she touched a display with her right hand and was quickly told not to touch anything again, Kate stood there for a minute but the urge was too great and she touched the display with her left hand, this meant that the teacher told her off and she had to complete a time out. Most of the time this wasn't something people noticed, Kate would touch first her right knee then her left, or put her lunch box in her bag with her right hand and then touch it with her left before going back to her friends.
Kate thought that doing these things was very silly but said that if she didn't do them she would not be able to stop thinking about it, and that eventually she just gave up and did it anyway.
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Christopher - It could happen!
Christopher had a lot of different fears. He was terribly afraid of thunderstorms, animals, insects, dentists, water, and the dark. His fear of thunderstorms was very difficult to deal with, a cloudy sky would cause him to worry that a terrible storm was coming and this would make it difficult for him to concentrate on his schoolwork. If a storm hit he would try to hide under a desk or bed. His fear of animals and insects meant that the family did not have any pets despite others in the family really wanting some, and often meant that he would not walk through parks or visit friends who had animals. His fear of water led to him avoiding learning to swim and he still insisted that the hall, bathroom and bedroom lights be left on all night so that it would not be dark. If out at night he clung to his friends or parents, and would be visibly distressed. The biggest difficulty was his fear of dentists. Christopher had become so distressed in his few visits to the dentist that it had become necessary for them to take him to the hospital where he could be made sleepy so that the dentist could check his teeth and do the necessary work. Christopher was generally a very fearful child and all of these fears made it difficult to participate in everyday activities.
